Boundaries and limits that are setting
Don’t let someone disrespect you merely since you have a pity party for them. Don’t explain away bad behavior since they had a negative time or even a childhood that is bad. Making excuses for bad behavoir is really what codependency seems like.
You’re permitted to set restrictions as to what habits cross the line. Having a hard time does|time that is difficult maybe not give individuals permission to deal with other people badly.